confetti

Dumber Than a Peter Pan Prequel

I will be creative. I will be creative. I will be creative. I will be creative. I will be creative.

Q: What is dumber than a Peter Pan prequel?

A: A Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade feature film.

Honestly, there’s creativity and then there’s insanity — perhaps with a touch of desperation.  The Hollywood Reporter claims:

Producers Scott Glassgold and Raymond Brothers of IAM Entertainment have closed a deal for rights to develop a film centering on the department store’s annual parade in New York.

“We’re aiming to make a four-quadrant, family-friendly film somewhere in that Night At The Museum, Elf sweet spot,” Glassgold says.

Good God, people.  Write an original story without brand-name recognition as the driving force.  I double-dog dare you!  You claim that’s what the market wants: material with familiarity.  I say bogus!  It’s sort of a chicken and egg scenario but big movies influence popular culture just as much as popular culture influences big movies.  Among other things contributing to the decline in movie theatre attendance is the increasing frequency in which patently abysmal ideas make it to screen.  I’ve seen more imagination in 4th-graders.

Get off the ‘prescription’ drugs and be creative in a non-corporate way, you feckless empty suits.

I’m talking not just to Hollywood in general but also, specifically to you, Scott Glassgold and Raymond Brothers.  You’ve now branded yourselves as having the artistic verisimilitude of a kumquat.  Perhaps less.

And yet, while you’re getting your film made, The Hollywood Reporter also notes in a separate article that Director Lee Daniels, despite two Oscars for Precious, is still trying to raise funds for Butler, a true life tale of White House butler Eugene Allen.  Can you guess which movie I would pay to see and which one I’d would rather piddle on?

Here’s a tip: Mr. Glassgold and Mr. Brothers should wear raincoats at their premiere.

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About Angelo Barovier

I was born. I'll be around for a while. Then I won't.

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